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choking on water is the worst because how do you stop choking? drink something? well ive got some bad news for you


casually call people “human” to unsettle them and make them question what sort of being you are


local teen found dead after friends convince him to jump off a dock. after jumping, the dock collapsed, crushing him. sources say that his death was a result of pier pressure


*batman voice* does anyone have a cough drop


"Billy where is your homework?"

"im sorry Ms. Klein my dog- *sees dog in the window make a throat cutting motion* -gone cat ate it”


I think I’m going to write a book called “‘Four Hours Is Definitely Enough Sleep’ And Other Lies I Tell Myself”